Note : I’m not talking about promises to religion or your lover or promises like taking an oath or something. The post is about promises made to self or the promises made to friends.
Ever had that day, when you said to yourself, or promised yourself that you’ll do something in future? You felt the need/desire of doing it at that time and since at that time, it wasn’t possible, so you kept it for the future time. . .
Well, it happens a lot, at least to me. Then, today I was thinking…Is it really needed to fulfill those old promises ? I mean, look it at like this – You are in a different situation now than you were at that point of time, you probably won’t even feel like doing it now. So, why do it ? Would it be good ? You wanted to do it at that time because you had wanted to do it. Now, you don’t. So should you still do it ? Even if you do, do you think you’ll be able to do it with as much commitment as you’d have given at that time? Probably not.
But, what about the “Promise” we made to ourselves? Promise is a powerful word. You promised someone something, you ought to do it then. You made him/her/yourself/something a commitment that you’ll do it. You’ll keep their word, it means. So, breaking a promise would be considered bad. People would say behind your back, “Hey, you know that person? Don’t befriend him/Don’t be close to him/He ain’t a good guy. He doesn’t know the meaning of promises.” and some might as well say it to your face too. Some might use more intense and offensive words than I used. But, should you be afraid of this and so, keep your promise? Wasn’t the promise made because you wanted to make one that time? Now, if you don’t feel like fulfilling it, is it any good to push yourself for doing it?
Say, you’re at some function or some big hall watching a performance say, a dance performance. Now, assume you know how to dance and you’re just not as perfect at it. Had you been, you might be one of them(on stage) getting an applause from the huge crowd. You feel like learning it. Proper, with perfection. You know you have it in somewhere inside, and you feel like being on stage too, performing with all that you have that’s still hidden from people. You, probably then think of learning it in vacations or say whenever you get some time free. Now, if in those holidays, you don’t feel like dancing anymore, should you?
Let’s consider one more example. Say, you had a party with some old friends a year ago. It was fun but you were not able to give much time to one of those friends at the party. You couldn’t talk or have fun with him/her as much as you’d have had in the past. Say, you come out to know from somebody it was one of the most boring parties for that friend. You certainly don’t feel good and wish to throw another one next time you all can meet or probably go out with that friend alone and give him/her some good time to cherish later. You promise yourself that you’ll make that person feel good again. Now, if presently, that friend isn’t even in touch or in the past year or so, you two haven’t been so good as you were at some time. Then what? Maybe, he/she has changed a lot or perhaps you, and now you don’t feel like going out and spending time with that friend. Then, should you ?
Isn’t this a place in life, that we come across many times, and when we have to choose only one of the two roads and whatever we choose is going to affect, either our relationships or ourselves. But, aren’t both really important in life? It all boils down to, if you wish to just follow your heart and do what you want to do at present, forget the past and never regret about it. Or, you can make a sacrifice and choose what your heart said at that time and your mind says now – to keep the promise you once made – probably sacrifice your feelings for someone’s happiness or for just being the one who keeps his words.
So, what is the actual solution? Which is the right road? Which way should we head to? That question can’t be answered in a general way always. It’ll mostly depend on the situation. But, what I’ve found is, most youth today would opt for being what they want to, at present. They don’t care for the past. Yesterday was yesterday, I was not enough mature, I didn’t know this, I didn’t know that, I was not as much right as I am now. So I’ll stick to what I wish to do now. And, let that old thought rest in peace. However, most old people, say your parents, and moreover your granny aged people would always like to stay with their words. They mean more to them. If they said something to themselves in the past, they surely want to respect their past. After all, it’s only the yesterday that grew up into a better today. So, as much as the two roads seem similar and equally likely, they are not. It’s like an old and a new road. The two paths are just separated (well mostly) by a generation gap.
There are hardly any people today who take the old barren road. Mostly, people do tend to take it at first, but they’re not appreciated. Today’s about time and for yourself, more than for others. Now, if this seems harsh, then nobody stops you from taking the old road. But, you might not end up being a perfect dancer, you might not be able to make that friend smile as much. You might not get any appreciation from public. Still, if that gives you satisfaction, then that’s your road. In earlier times, people do used to get appreciated for keeping their words. So, they felt nicer too, even if they couldn’t fulfill the promise exactly as they said. Now, that happiness ain’t there. So, if you want appreciation and your present, you choose the new road.
Old promises have left with Old people only. We live in a world where what matters is our future and in the future, we forget our past that made it like it is now.
I, still like to take the old road as much as I can. But that’s just my choice. What’s your take ? You don’t need to be embarrassed of choosing one road or the other. It’s pure choice. Choosing the old one requires courage, though.